Oliver North is The Pitchman for "Call of Duty"

Every time I think the modern gaming industry cannot sink any lower, I am proven wrong. This is... inexcusable, even for this industry. This is disgusting, despicable. This is evil. Oliver North - a man who was convicted of what many feel amount to (but do not technically qualify as) war crimes - is doing commercials for "Call of Duty."

Hey, I've got an idea - Charles Manson isn't doing anything right now, maybe he'd like to lend a thumbs-up to the next "Manhunt?" Or maybe we can get some actual gangbangers to stump for GTAV?

Are you fucking SERIOUS, Activision??
For those you too young to remember, North was the central figure in the Iran-Contra scandal - in which he was effectively the "bagman" for a covert and illegal scheme by agents of the U.S. government to sell weapons to Iran (an enemy nation) and funnel the profits to The Contras, a Nicaragaun rebel group opposing the Sandinista government of the time.

North was convicted, but it was overturned via an ACLU appeal (strange bedfellows and all that); and since the Sandinista's were "dirty commies" and North did his dirty-work during the time of Saint Reagan, he remains a folk-hero to far-right Conservatives to this day. But this isn't an issue of politics - or rather it shouldn't be. If you can't see why this is a horrifying development after reading the provided links about who North is, I don't know what else to say to you.

Congratulations, Activision - this is officially the worst thing a video game company has ever done to promote it's game. You win. You're the new champ. Say hi to EA for me when you go to pick up the trophy.

Un-fucking-believable...

BLOPS To The Future

With this emergence into general public knowledge of weaponized military drones over the last few years, it seemed innevitable that we were going to start getting schlocky technophobe-paranoia action movies reminding us how "Ya just can't trust those dang machines!!!" and that no matter how advanced our fancy-shmancy technobabble gets we're always gonna need "Real. Hard. Men. RARGH!" to bail us out.

What didn't seem innevitable - but, in retrospect, probably ought to have - was that Hollywood would get beaten to the punch on this new subgenre by a "Call of Duty" game: The trailer for "Black Ops 2" reveals that the game takes place in the near-future and finds you battling unmanned military machinery that's been hijacked by Al Qaeda/North Korea/Russia/Neo-Nazis/China/Does-It-Really-Matter. I like the Tank With Feet:



I'm not even joking - I think Tank With Feet is immediately my favorite "Call of Duty" character ever.

I'd also like to thank the good folks at Treyarch for effectively demonstrating what Michael Bay's adaptation of "Metal Gear" would look like...

Fan Art

Check out this nifty TGO fan art from elbubojr, imagining what the show's characters might look like if it were animated (or if I had a higher costume budget and/or more actors):

Love it.

He also did color versions of NecroThinker, PyroThinker, CryoThinker, RetroThinker and both forms of The Anti-Thinker, after the jump:

 Awesome. I especially like "Antiverse Form" Anti-Thinker as a plus-size bruiser, and his design of NecroThinker actually nails the "Kirby/Starlin Cosmic Villain" look I was going for overall better than the actual costume does, IMO.

Good stuff, either way - actually got re-invigorated by this to go out and start pricing-out props for the two (so far) new character's who'll be showing up once the NecroThinker story concludes. I won't say who/what they are, but one of them will mark the first time I've had to wear a wig on the show. (There would've been one already, but I ultimately decided to spare you a one-off character called "UberThinker, who was German and... yeah, that was kind of the whole joke.)

Sony's "Smash Bros." Clone Looks Like a "Smash Bros." Clone

People have been referring to the rumored "Playstation All-Stars Battle Royale" as a Playstation-centric version of "Super Smash Bros" since it was first mentioned, but I doubt anyone was expecting it would be almost exactly the same game:

EPISODE 69: "AfterMass"

Sick of talking/hearing about "Mass Effect?" Me too. But newsworthy is newsworthy, and the next "big" gaming story (in terms of news or even a discussionworthy new release) has yet to rear it's head. So one more round - especially in light of how dramatically the Bioware/Re-Take thing evolved after the last episode. And even if that's not really your bag, this one also has zombies, gunfights, the return of The OverSword and a much bigger helping of Ivan the Intern:



This episode evolved along strange lines. The topic I initially wanted to cover wasn't quite coming up adequate at the script-level (I think I've since cracked it, or at least gotten closer); and eventually it made more sense to do a "sequel" of sorts to "Crass Effect" - especially since the framing-story action in this sort of mirrors the previous episode already i.e. both revolving around "game company under attack" visual sequences. Also, the aforementioned "troublesome script" goes MUCH better with the action in the next episode (which more-directly involves NecroThinker.)

What I'm more curious to see than anything is how having Ivan pop in with added commentary in the "main" part of the show "plays" for people. The day after I recorded the audio, I was thinking it sounded overly-confrontational and wanted to add in some levity and qualifiers; and "interupting myself" in Ivan's persona felt like a better way to pull off those additions. Also, Ivan really does seem to be the "breakout character" of the supporting cast - something that continues to pleasantly-surprise me - so you can maybe consider this a "trial run" at maybe giving him a bigger presence in the show and possibly beyond that.

JOY

There may come a day when Nintendo's monetization of nostalgia becomes so completely predictable that something as relatively simple as ressurecting power-ups from Super Mario Bros. 3 is no longer sufficient to settle anything that could be bothering me at any given moment, leaving me in a blissful near-stupor of psychological comfort.

Today is not that day:

Image is one of a handful of just-released snaps of "New Super Mario Bros. 2;" a 2D sidescroller previously announced for the 3DS, now revealed and dated for August. Also announced right around the same time (but with fewer details) is a 20th Anniversary "Kirby Collection" compilation coming for Wii. No world yet on which games it would include (presumably the NES/SNES ones I imagine, hoping the GameBoy/GBA/DS and maybe even N64 ones too.)

Nintendo also supposedly registed a "Super Mario 4" domain name, which could mean nothing. However, a yet-unidentified WiiU Mario game (launch title!?) is supposed to be announced at E3. I'm obviously psyched for this stuff because... y'know, I just AM; but I'm also glad that the new-generation fans who got introduced to 2D Mario via "New Super Mario Bros. Wii" (which is still killing, sales-wise) will have more to look forward to than my generation's leftovers.

I wonder... is it perhaps too much to hope that the Frog and Hammer suits will make a comeback here as well?

Episode 69 Announcement!

"Episode 69: AfterMass" will be viewable by all audiences on Wednesday, April 25th. ScrewAttack Advantage members can get an early look at this link NOW.